If you are basking in the glow of two dozen red roses, or bloated from consuming large amounts of imported chocolates or giddy at the prospect of the last-minute trip to Paris your Valentine just presented to you...this post is not for you.
If you have a husband that you adore the other 364 days of the year (except Valentine's Day)....read on;
Scott is a loving husband, father, son, brother, friend....he is in fact a much nicer person than myself. A plan-ahead type person...sadly..he is not. Adding to this dilemma is the fact that we live almost an hours drive from civilization (in the form of malls, flower shops etc.) so there is really no possibility of "last-minute shopping". Do you see where I'm going with this?
Now I know what you're thinking...it's not about the commercial stuff. He could have made me a home made heart shaped cake, or a delicate red paper heart garland, but remember ladies...he has no idea what Pinterest is.
This morning I was not awakened to heart-shaped pancakes served in bed....I was awakened, however, when the dog farted in our bedroom. That's the kind of Valentine's Day I'm talking about.
So while I love him dearly and he does kind things every other day for me, my warm, fuzzy Valentine's memories are scarce.
I just got finished baking some heart shaped sugar cookies, I noticed that if I turn them upside down the top of the heart looks like buttocks....which may come in handy if I need to moon someone later.
PS: If the joke is on me and he pulls out a surprise later today I'll have to retract this post...but don't hold your breath.